December Rain, 17.12.2018

…A sudden uninvited spell of rain in Kolkata has brought the city to a standstill. Drivers turning on the wipers after a while and selecting random songs from their boring playlists. The rain drops on the window panes trickling down to get accumulated near the rubber gaskets. The trees with dried up leaves are bowing down to have a feel of the winter rain. The view through the cab window pane was hence very blurry and vague. Konkona was browsing the internet, searching desperately for articles which analyse technically the emotions and the painful acceptance of falling out of love. Neither the rain nor the busy traffic of the city affected Konkona’s search for a lucid article on the dark sides of love.

Finally, when her cab reached Park Street, she found an article on the concept of ‘forever’. It was an interesting article on the website of Scoop Whoop which talked about ‘forever’ being the existence of a passion within and not a person. She finally found a validation of her decision to part ways with Suman. May be this was the 600th time that she was searching for some kind of validation. She loved him truly and more than that Suman was a friend to her. Konkona was a woman with the co-existence of two completely opposite emotional dimensions within her mind. The act of being totally submissive to her partner and the act of being totally independent. It is this co-existence that made her a complete human being. Moreover, the fluidity of her two states was like a Himalayan river breaking off from her main course or joining back very smoothly.

She kept reading the article and was reminiscent of her days with Suman. The days spent in dynamic conversations about politics, music and society. The days spent in glee filled laughter and sudden travel plans. The days spent in watching and discussing alternative cinema. The days spent in writing together on the multi dimensional characters of the human psyche. The driver of her cab turned on the Radio and surprisingly a Kabir Suman song woke her up from her sleep. She realised that she had been in deep sleep since she boarded the cab. The song that woke her up said,
‘মন খারাপ করা
মন খারাপ করা বিকেল মানেই মেঘ করেছে
দূরে কোথাও দু-এক পশলা বৃষ্টি হচ্ছে
মন খারাপ করা
মন খারাপ করা বিকেল মানেই মেঘ করেছে’

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